


Tiny Head Mcgee and the Gemsexual

by Gurdersnur



Category: League of Legends
Genre: Gen, Slice of Life
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-21
Updated: 2017-08-21
Packaged: 2018-12-18 01:34:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 420
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11863899
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gurdersnur/pseuds/Gurdersnur





	Tiny Head Mcgee and the Gemsexual

Taric wandered through the dank, oddly well-lit city-state of Zaun. For being such a shit place, it had an oddly nice atmosphere. It was something Taric could appreciate. Well, sure, it had a depressing lack of gemstones and/or crystals, but it still has a pleasant aesthetic. This particular corner of Zaun smelled slightly less unpleasant than every other area he had visited so far. A small amount of steam blew from the wall to his right, but it didnt bother him. To him, it was merely a pleasant warmth, thanks to his precautionary wards. 

"Stop!" Taric heard a masculine, somewhat gravelly voice shout from behind him. He turned gracefully to see a monstrous man with a head that is far too small running towards him in full plate armor.

"What could you possibly want, mister?" Taric asked, his voice laced with disgust at this man's unsightly propotions.

"You have violated the law!" the man yelled, his voice booming. "Pa-" he began, but Taric interrupted.

"Now, now, what law could I have broken?" Taric asked, trying to not stare at the knight's head.

"You... you are clearly using magic! Right in front of me! That is unacceptable!" 

Taric frowned. "I don't see a problem with that. I mean, sure, it's not that common, but I feel it adds a bit of flair to my everyday life." Taric flipped his hair dramatically. "Besides, this isn't some magician-hating country like Demacia or whatever."

"B-"

"But enough of that." Taric gazed at the sadly misshapen man's armor. "Those are some fantastic gemstones in your shoulders. Absolutely fabulous."

"Why would that matter?" Tiny-head asked. "I, Garen, must remove you before you cause damage! You are a sorcerer, who knows what sort of havoc you will wreak?"

"It will be none, I assure you. Er, changing the subject again, can you shield your head? Preferably with a large helm? The size of your skull is off-putting to me." Taric said bluntly. 

Garen looks infuriated. "You dare insult-" he began, but apparently he can't go twenty seconds without being interrupted by one thing or another as a peasant from up above jumped down in an attempt at suicide. He landed, but lived, his mangled, broken body laying on the ground.

Both men looked down at the specimen in shock, and then the unthinkable happened. It was a christmas miracle. All traces of negative emotion between the two faded away, and they laughed like two gay mall Santas who just heard an orphan ask for some parents.


End file.
